Tag Archives: hope

I can see you (7 Dec 2011)

24 Jan

today I praise you, I am humbled by you
in your unconscious way, you saw
what must be done
that the two of us, that husbandwife team
could no longer sustain
our own journey
to become
whole and complete

you saw in that unconscious way
two spirits who had outlived
each other
our karma was gone
(did I hurt you this bad last time?)
our need to dream
together
became less important
than our need to wake up

in this way, I can see you

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waking up (7 Dec 2011)

24 Jan

waking up from this fantasy
left open wounds, constant bleeding
I never knew if life or death
was more appealing

I never knew what I was capable of

pain, like that of an unborn child
can have no name, no face
and yet it cuts the deepest
loss of all

surface (02 April 2011)

7 Jun

I’m trying to surface
he grabbed my hand
he said let’s have fun

it’s a bubble of air

impermanence (21 April 2011)

26 Apr

Christchurch
it’s easy to see
when you pan out
impermanence

#

if a city can fall
a marriage can fail

#

the sacred sites
were made of bricks
and they crumbled
when the earth stretched

#

there are rocks
like castles
that house the new congregation

how did we come (14 Sept 2010)

22 Sep

How did we come to water,
or water come to us…
because we needed to drink, yes
but it’s drawn out like emotions, teased
into existence, because
we had to master survival,
like there’s a rhythm for us to learn.

How did we come by air,
because it’s invisible to us really
so innate, intrinsic, inherent
and yet at one point, someone said
we breath… Air. And now
we think and think
and think, like we deserve it.

How did we respond to earth
as something under us,
or in our way, or to be climbed over.
How did we skip over the grace
of our earth in a few short decades,
and not see every variation
as part of our survival.

How did we learn about fire,
watching it burst into heat
and light and roar with total
indifference, and somehow we kept
a little parcel of this sacred,
held by sacred people
to light the way.

I didn’t win (4 Mar 2010)

29 Jun

and I question
what’s the point of Hope?
I mean, it denies a

perfect moment
for something other than
it is

I thought the perfect
moment looked like
me, an up-shot, a never

heard of before poet
recounting how the
poem was “given”

in meditation a year ago
to beget this perfect moment
– Winning

well, it did beget a perfect
moment – instead – it showed me
my fears in exposing and expressing

it showed me that as long
as I hope for something
other than it is

then I am denying reality
deluding my truth
pampering my illusion

and yet, when I drop Hope
the quality left is not
hopeless

there is another word
needed
a quality of word

that is without Hope
and without hopeless
without all expectations

yet open to all options

maybe this word
is called Reality
or Perfection

wretched (15 Oct 2009)

24 Jan

the most insane thing I can experience is Hate
(when I am irreconcilable to love)
it need only to live in one thought

it says; you bring out the worst in me
and I believe it because I bite and lash out
I snarl at the leash that you put round my neck

I heave in my cave where you don’t allow my silence
I am echoing with revulsion at how little I love
my membrane is so thin, a scratch becomes caverns of
  separation

I collapse, this is not what I want
I am loathed to open my eyes
I drown in the insanity
  of hating this moment
I am exhausted, wretched, in utter despair

The most insane thing I can experience is Hate
oh God!
Let light find me in my sleep.

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