Tag Archives: yearning

perhaps (02 April 2011)

7 Jun

the sufi’s spin
round, they know
what it is to yearn

perhaps I was one of them
perhaps I forgot
who the beloved was


I need a muse (26 March 2011)

27 Mar

I need a muse like I need God
I need to colour my life
with carrier pigeons

and love letters
written behind closed doors
on the floor at night


I need the footsteps
of my life to sound out
into your world
and know the glorious echoes

are heard – tell me – can you contain
me in the quiet chamber of your heart?
Will you call upon me
as the beginning sound of creation?

If you hold this for me
I will call you.

You are so rare


Meet me
Meet me now
See how ruffled I am
  without you

Stop dropping me off
at the doorstep

Take me inside


A muse is such a gift
if you were to leave…
if you were to leave…
you’d awaken in me

the yearning that’s inside all of us


These things come undone
in their own time and way
You’re the poetry
Graffiti on the moon

I hang to the mid-air

and I point to you and I point to you
and then one day
I point that yearning towards

I point that yearning towards


I need a muse like I need God

This yearning is so precious.


I’ve been waiting for you (03 Mar 2011)

13 Mar

Billy Holiday sings
I iron pillow cases
It is a rainy day.

I imagine I am a 1950s house-wife
and I care too much
or I yearn too much

for something else
to complete me.

I am a modern wife
and pulled, seemingly yanked
I abandon my ironing

and meet my man
in his chambers;
I’ve been waiting for you he says

one animal (5 Feb 2011)

23 Feb

he was lying on the couch
a bolster under his knees
she was straddled on top
like a baby wrapped to his mother’s heart

they were resting
maybe she was crying
into the nap of his neck
but in there I saw an effortless

collapsed and held in the same gesture
they were the weave of one body
they lay merged before passion

resting as a union of mind
I walked past
and my cells reached out
into that empty


for the intimacy under my body
for my body to collide
in that way, to stop
and swallow his heartbeat

as milk
to feel our bellies
breathing as one animal
breathing as one animal

I felt the gap
the missing breath of my own
and the animal that I am

for we have not breathed as one

we have not bled
as one animal

night come day come night come day (14 Nov 2010)

4 Dec

I want to walk
  there will be soft clothes

I’ll look serene
  my hair will be down
   and wild

I’ll see you
   a sadness will overtake me

never has my heart
  glowed like this
   like I’d swallowed the moon

and you the sun
  I will fall
   like rain

on the earth I am her puddle
  her splash of sorrow
   her white gown shifting like a cloud

and I am wanting
  to be held, to be opened
   to be stolen

by night come day come night come day

I want to be held
  I want to be lifted
   from this world

I didn’t put veils on my
  wedding gown
   but imagine lifting them

each one
  each layer
   and lifting my dress

each petal
  and then you gather such strength
   such lust

for the stars and me
  and you want to take us home
   to find the star dust in me

you want to hold your tongue
   and catch the milk of the moon

you want to lick my thighs
  and remind me I’m human
   and lost

you want to lift the very last veil for me
  you want to take us
   into every space

come night come day come night come day

you want
  to show me
   where no thing resides

that feeling (4 Aug 2010)

27 Aug

as if a dream
  were needed
you wake up
  a tender certainty
pressing all around you
because you touched
the essence of your life
the oldest Love

embraces you
oh it’s too much to
  ever want to let go
it fills
  it sates
it is complete and life
  takes you away
on a journey

  to the twelve weather stations
and you’ve passed
  the usefulness of these
recordings and predictions
  you leave, still
knowing that tender touch
and a long ago voice
asks, can I join you?

‘no’ you reply
for you have outgrown
even that voice
filled with useful
advice and offering
  a short cut

you walk
  and wake
you walk and you wake
remembering that embrace
what dimension of love
is pulling you?

Root Chakra (11 Feb 2010)

11 Feb

I start this journey at the Base
Earth, Grounding
Set in motion on the Camino de Santiago

Set a light by a life
That knows me as
Someone other than I am

I have a choice
Yet I give the decision away
Because I can’t find a reason

Watch me as I claw to Stability
At every cross roads
Where something more is being asked of me

Yet, stability is what I clutch to
I reason it as loyalty, honour, integrity
(like my mother taught)

I feel it as disquiet and a yearning that injures
All I know

If I am to survive; truly survive
Then I need to touch the one thing
That brings me alive


So here are the letters to my soul
When I cried to her as an unknown being
Of such gravity and grace

Knowing only that there was something
More to life and me
Than the impending marriage into society

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